Girls, don’t settle for less. A Call to action.

There is this girl in our office who literally kicks ass: she is smart, strong, gets what she wants during the meetings and I really admire her. Yesterday, I happened to sit next to her boyfriend, while he was talking to her on the phone. He shouted at her for at least 20 minutes, called her names and was very rude. I sat in silence together with 4 other colleagues while the boyfriend was treating her badly and was having an argument with her, with his phone on speaker. She did not object to anything, we could not hear her voice apart from some Ok, ok.

Then I wondered: Why do we (girls) accept this behavior? What is wrong with us? Why can we be strong when it comes to the job and not when it comes to choosing our boyfriend?

At first I thought that I would have broken up immediately if my boyfriend treated me like this. Then I recalled my previous boyfriend to whom I allowed to treat me as if I was useless (luckily for both of us, we eventually broke up).

This post goes to all the girls who think that it is normal to be weak when it comes to relationships, who think that guys have the ultimate power and that they can call us names, play games with us and our feelings, cheat on us, be mad at us with no reason and behave as if they were the masters and commanders of everything.

Dear girls, we can do better! I can promise you that each one of us can do better.

In life, you always get what you think you deserve. If you underestimate yourself, then others will do the same. If you think that a guy is allowed to humiliate you publicly because you made a mistake, then you will get such a guy. If you think that you should settle for less just because you don’t have the perfect look or curves, then you will get less.

So let’s not think of our flaws anymore, of our non-perfect bodies, of our mistakes, of our non-blue eyes or of our non-long legs.

Let’s think of our kind hearts, of the challenges we have overcome so far in life, of everything we have achieved, of every place we’ve traveled to, of every book we’ve read, of every passion we have, of how perfectly imperfect we are. I think we’re pretty awesome, right?

Now let’s just stop trying to find just a guy who would accept our flaws, let’s stop the willingness to compromise, let’s stop underestimating ourselves and let’s start looking for a guy who has the same passions, who likes what we like, who has a kind heart and who respects us.

Let’s find some self-respect and strength when it comes to our own person, let’s stop being superficial and weak, and if we do so, we will only attract guys who respect us and treat us well. Those guys exist, I know for sure. And remember, you need to feel good with yourself first if you wanna feel good with another person.

So suck it up, start respecting yourself and be happy about who you are if you want to find a person who loves you!